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When someone says Im proud of you, its important to take the time to think about how you want to respond. I guess its an odd word and I stay away from it because I know how sensitive I am to it. For doing what Im supposed to do? May these Proud Quotes On Success inspire you to take action so that you may live your dreams. Thanks to you, as well for being such a caring and supportive partner. Graduates: TBA, Grandparents: PET for Grandparents. 1. Just the way you look and react to your husband can give the impression that you are honored to be his wife. Well done!. I can make it possible only because you give me hope. They seem to make him quite happy. Sometimes people use it to appropriate the achievements of others, which is a sad and awful thing. And now, that you have the other responses to I am proud of you, you can share the same based on whos saying this and after which event. 03:48. 3. . When somebody says that you are wrong: "You are entitled to your incorrect opinion." To each his own. It can also help to show appreciation to others and can help to create stronger relationships. Im so glad to hear that. If you're a friend, it's friendly. The only people there who went to university were the pharmacist, the physician/surgeon, lab technologist, x-ray technician and the like, as well as the school teachers. 9 Focus on Them When Praising Them PeopleImages / Getty Images Let me tell you why. In what context. Never downplay the way you feel about someone's abilities and effort. But to be proud of them? Sometimes a simple change of scenery might help you to stop thinking negative thoughts. I realized that I needed to open myself up to friends and partners as well. Don't disguise it as concern, either. People Who Say These 5 Words Have Very Low Emotional Intelligence. 5. That makes you a living miracle. Im proud of myself, although saying it out loud doesnt make it better. We had a really nice time. I started to cry with the realization that in my 40+ years I had never heard it from anyone but him. Lets look at some examples (followed by some suggested alternatives) adult first, then child, to help illustrate this point: Manager: "Im proud of the report youve written". May God's blessings be bestowed upon you forever and always. Originally Published: March 28, 2018. momcilog/E+/Getty . So you better know in which tone theyre saying so. Isnt she elevating herself above me to oversea my behaviors to make sure I was a good little girl? As if Im mentally retarded and reading a book for the first time in my life, and hoping to get a cookie and a star sticker. In other words, I care so much about the other person, that their accomplishment can evoke pride in ME. They didn't have to do that. I admire your ability to ___________. Updated: Dec. 11, 2020. Approval is a parent's judgement of a child's choices - and to a child, this feels like a judgement of them as a person. I guess after receiving the compliment, I felt that he was patronizing me, because I have only had my parents or teachers say they were proud of me. They have everything to do with your strength, and what you've endured. I'm so proud of your painting!" Of course, the child may feel really pleased to hear this positive evaluation of their efforts. Youre the most amazing parents and thank you for believing in me. This is what makes the difference in whether the receiver feels great or resentful. Its also important to remember the power of positive reinforcement and the benefits of responding with gratitude. They know I mean: I am so impressed by what you did, and proud to be able to call myself your mother. If I said this to a friend it would mean the same thing. However what messages might our children actually hear? To reply to that right, here are the better and funny responses to I am proud of you from your bestie. Overall, its reserved for people who you trust and respect. 8. Posted articles do not constitute advice or recommendations. Whoever those people are, they are probably your mentors. This has always happened, but in a context like the current one, in which both rivalry and appearances are highly valued elements, it is very common for this class of individuals, educated to become this way, to appear. But who are you to affirm? 10. you see the work of your close friend and you tell him "I am proud of you". I have always struggled with this word. 3. said Christopher Robin. As your friend I want you to know that there is nothing I wouldn't do for you. If there is a mentor relationship, fine, but when the relationship is supposed to be about equals, You must log in or register to reply here. This expression is much more self-focused, i.e. Anyone could tell how proud he is to be with you by the giant grin that's plastered on his face when you two are together. Ive been totally using that word all wrong sheesh, all the complaints about the misuse of the word makes me feel bad about what and how I been addressing my peers and friends. A teacher or a mentor can be proud of their student, but you can't really be proud of your peers. Refresher workshop for P.E.T. 26. Friend: "At least you have a job or daughter.". I had an experience where a friend, who I consider in every way my equal, noticed that I made a healthy food choice (not that I didnt before, but I think its the first time he noticed) and he said, Oh Im so proud of you!. I still think she was doing this at the time. Imperfect, striving, playful, loving, learning. Reading the Parent Effectiveness Training book, or attending a PET course, will help develop positive and respectful parent-child relationships, and explore alternatives to praise. I do not believe that parents need to say "I'm proud of you" to show their support of, and their emotional connection to, their child. The insiders felt they were all superior to newcomers, no matter what the newcomers backgrounds were. The rest were manual labourers. I have deep concerns if children crave to hear "I'm proud of you" because they want to know that their parents approve of them - of their behaviour, of their decisions in life. It means that in their eyes you have come a long way from a place you began. Even if the other person's words and/or actions seem reprehensible, try to be as . Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude has many benefits. Let them know that you are grateful for their support. "How long have you been sober?". What if you really are proud of the person? This can help to create stronger relationships and can help to create a positive and constructive environment. Especially when you get to hear this from your parents, it means theyre happy to see you grow up the way they raised you. (I'd prefer "Wow, that must have taken some thought and courage! ), Partner: "I'm proud of you for landing that job", While you might understand that your partner is being supportive, might you also feel a bit miffed? ), belonging to my close friend, on her business page. 2. Embrace Pride There are positive reasons to listen when someone says they are proud of you. "We will always remember. The words hit me like a . That way, all they have to do is show up. You are asked at the cocktail party what you do. I dont think that without your support I can make it. 13. If you feel stuck on getting that pride going or can't seem to identify the traits or qualities you're most proud of in yourself, go back in time. She continually updates her course with new examples and relevant material from the latest research. Its a way of saying I see the hard work youve put in and I appreciate it. Thats why we feel pride in our childrens accomplishments. Think of things people have often praised. I am proud of them for being like this with one another. Taking a few deep breaths can help you focus. Oh.. very good. That proud phrase didnt bother me at first, but the more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder, what does she mean when she says shes proud of me? Probably no big deal but would be interested in input from others especially other females. She said yes and then she said she wanted to go with me. Our children need to know that we believe in them, that we trust them, that we support them, that we love them, that we acknowledge them as individuals separate from us. Maybe Im mad, because it makes me feel like he thinks I wasnt doing enough before I started back at work- like carrying children inside of my body for nearly two years, plus birthing them, plus never sleeping, plus cleaning for HOURS upon HOURS everyday, plus cooking, plus plus plus wasnt enough to be proud of. In the South, people are proud of you if they know you. The effect of this praise might be opposite to the aim of the parent. They include: courage, commitment, imagination and compassion, and oh yes, patience -- lots of it -- because it doesn't happen overnight. There are some super special and engaging responses you can give when someone very close to you, says that theyre proud of you. Because we ran into a bunch of other classmates that were also there, we didnt spend time exclusively with each other but we did sit together at the game. You would have to know the whole story. Its more potent because they have seen struggles in their life, and within that perspective, they still acknowledge the effort I have put into the achievement as deserving of recognition. Setting goals you can achieve, also called "realist goals," reduces the chance of frustration or doubting yourself or your abilities. Thanks for all the interresting comments and opinions on how people use the phrase Im proud of you. The reader alone is responsible for any action they take as a result of reading this website. When someone says "I'm proud of you", they are expressing their admiration and respect for you - and that can be a powerful thing. Use words that will strengthen your relationship. Im proud of you could be seen as an external judgement a parents verdict on a childs performance. Thanks! The administrator takes no responsibility for any action or outcome a reader may make as a result of reading a post. But, the real credit goes to you and you only! 7. For even more than mentors, but for people who deserve your care and attention in life. Express your own feelings of appreciation and gratitude. How often do we utter this common parenting phrase, in moments of pleasure at our childs latest achievement? I knew it, if no one was going to like this. This is when his feelings go deeper than the surface, and he genuinely cares about you as a person. For me, this was a huge take-away moment. Thank you, mom and dad, youre the reason for this. Like Im only worth anything just because Im making money? Its powerful. Here are some examples of ways you can respond to Im proud of you: These responses will show your appreciation for their words and will help to strengthen your relationship. I also told her I had a great time & that she picks up my spirits. The other three sound as if you're saying you're proud of yourself too. I believe the effort has been worth it for my children, and our relationship. Encouraging children and others to be proud of themselves is healthier. The Four Words That Can Protect Your Child's Mental Health, Parenting Behaviours Linked to Suicide Amongst Adolescents, How to let your children know you are proud of them (Very Well Family), First published 28th August, 2014. I can take pride if I made a contribution, but I have to frame it that way. Want to Change the Way you React to Your Children? 2. But worse, my friend thanked them. They just say it. Future Planet. 11. Immune Response. The phrase "Im proud of you" insinuates that the speaker (parent, teacher, co-worker, boss) has more experience, or power, or in some manner has the right to pronounce their opinion, on someone elses effort. Simply thanking them or hugging them is an immediate reaction to it. Next course: We hope to run a face to face course beginning in early May, 2023. 2. But I believe that spouses say it, and siblings. This will help to create a bond between the two of you and will strengthen your relationship. The phrase that has always hit me hardest, however, has been "I'm proud of you." Someone saying that they're proud of you implies that, not only are they impressed by what you do and who you are, they also want others to know it. And John is left feeling confused and despondent.